Onapookalam (Flower Carpet) Competition

There used to be a floral carpet competition in our school. When it was introduced in our school, it was a house level competition. The number of participant for each floral competition was 3 and all the 3 should be from same group/house. So if you win this competition, the points will be added to your house. But there can be any number of such groups from a single house. But the very next year this was changed. It was changed into a class wise competition. So each class has to have a floral carpet. we won it for 3 years consecutively. More than winning there are so many small memories which made it worth. Those days’ flowers were collected from each of our houses. We used to collect 5 INR from each student with which all the expenses for the competition were met.  The duration of competition would be 3 hours.

It would start at 9.30 AM & end at 12.30 PM. A group of boys would go and collect the flower from the shop. And another set of boys & girls would start drawing the pre selected design on the floor which is the most tedious process. And that was the most time consuming part of the competition. Those days, we used beetroots too. So they should be peeled & grated. The common flowers used were Yellow & Orange Chrysanthemum (Jamanthi), Pink Oleander (Arali), Jasmine (Mulla), Jungle geranium (Chethipoo), Globe Amaranths (Vadarmalli), Rose, Lotus & Shatavari leaves. Of these Rose & Lotus would be used just to place it in the middle as they were very expensive. Once the flowers were brought, the flowers should be separated to petals. So the remaining set of girls & boys who were left out will form into small separate groups engaging in segregation & separation of petals. There would be music playing around in the class along with the noise of discussion. There would be some having fun fights in between. Once the design on the floor is ready, and then starts the real chaos. Because, that’s when we get an idea on amount of flowers we have. It won’t go with what we had discussed on previous days. So the flower arrangement starts with all such confusions & discussions. And final part which is also equally important is the presentation which would be done last 10 minutes before the end time. It includes cleaning of classroom too after which we are supposed to get out of the classroom and floral carpet ready for valuation of judges. 

Meanwhile there used to be payasam(An Indian dessert made using rice, milk etc) distribution. Most of our students’ lunch for that day would just be that payasam. The results would be declared during the onam celebration part which happens afternoon. There would be different other competitions/cultural activities related to onam festival like tug of war, puli kali etc. And this would be on the last day of our school before onam vacation of 10 days. So it would be a kind of mixed feelings - Happiness of celebration & sadness of separation for next 10 days. 

Long Distance Relationship

I have heard from my friends & relatives that long distance relationships won’t survive. When this proposal came, many of them reminded me of it as well. Recently a friend of mine, who is also a sailor Queen, had posted this thing. That’s when this topic came to my mind. It’s true that there is a hardship in maintaining a long distance relationship. But if you are trying to meet from both ends, it truly is a blessing too. Communication plays an important role in a long distance relationship. But that itself is the main problem in a sailor’s life. No Internet Onboard. But there are email systems in which every single person can read your mail. There is no privacy. But here too our mother tongue helped us. Our mother tongue, Konkani – being a minority language is followed by very less people. So whenever I had to send special messages, I used to type in English. I had to wait for several days for his phone call. (P.S. I can’t make a call even if I wish to make one). That’s when I started to make use of this Email system to its fullest. I used to compose my mail as if I’m writing a diary but with timestamps, and would click send only just a minute before I go to sleep. So there were days when there used to be really long mails. I used to share even a minute details of things happened around me, how I felt that day etc without missing any single detail. Another drawback of this email system is that it is a pure text message which means, you can’t attach any document or photo. Also it has some word limit too. My sailor is a very big fan of Manchester United Football Club. So I used to send him the daily match report. But that single match report has to be sent in 4-5 emails part by part as there was limit in size per mail. Also there shouldn’t be any image or emojis either. But these emails have helped us to build a foundation for our relation. It is through these emails, we started to know each other. His emails would normally end in 2-3 sentences.

Every individual in a relationship has to be given their personal space. People belonging to elder generation find fault in whatever new gen do. But there is a thing which I really like about new gen. New gen couples believe in sharing. Let it be a household chore or parenting or financial or any other matter. There is a mutual respect for each individual rather than for dominance/authoritative. So this long distance relation has helped us in believing sharing & mutual respect. We both discuss together and either of us has never stopped the other from pursuing her/his dream. All the decisions taken (even if it is against my/his will) have been discussed among us. Sometimes, lessons are to be learnt from one’s own experiences/failures. We do have our long night conversations and all of them are not mature or about our future plans. At times, we too become the naughty & mischievous kid hidden in our heart.

There would be lot of love immediately after he returns back from the ship. But the moment it’s time for fight, he will have to join the ship. It doesn’t mean that we don’t fight. Yes, we do. But the fights are also the mode of communication. And the fights are not carried over to next day because there would be another new reason to fight for the next day. 😜

The long distance has also made us realize how much we are dependent/independent on each other. It has made both of us strength as well as weakness for either of us. The long distance relationship is purely based on a trust that whatever may come your way; the other will support you blindly. It gives you time & space for healing, understanding & self development. Also there is no matter of taking for granted in a long distance relationship. And if it’s a sailor in particular, then one can say that you have won a jackpot. He is the one who knows/understands the value of time, effort & hard work. So when a sailor is on vacation, he makes use of every second to its maximum. Even in the midst of his never ending courses & exams.